Most of us are dependant people ...whether we would like to admit it or not ...we need certain things to be in place for our sense of well-being and balance. One of these essentials is the need for healthy relationships. I know how much I value relationships and I know how fragile they are.
God knows how important these relationships are and how easily they are broken. Proverbs, the book of wisdom, has much to say about how He feels towards the importance of friendships
The following is a direct quote from a portion of this devotional: .(http://www.eaf.net/pantinghart/2008/taking-up-an-offense/)
Sometimes — oftentimes, it seems — we humans take personally a wrong (real or imagined) done against another. Even though no harm has been done to us, we take personal offense. We may feel insulted, angry, hurt, bitter, and/or who knows what else. We may even enter into a conflict that is not our own at all.
I thought of that when I read verse 30 this morning:
30 Do not accuse a man for no reason —
when he has done you no harm. Proverbs 3:30
I have heard it said ... and have watched it being lived out the saying that goes something like:
An enemy of my friend is an enemy of mine.
I have seen potential relationships that never had a chance to develop because someone has taken up another person's offense. It looks something like this: I share with a close friend how Bill humiliated me in public. This makes my friend angry at Bill (who he hardly knows). Bill is unaware of any of the feelings that are being generated. My friend avoids Bill, even tells others who does not know Bill that Bill is arrogant and coldhearted and repeats the story that how Bill humiliated his close friend (me) in public. The offense grows and now at least 2 others are caught up in an event they did not experience and knows only the "cliff notes" version. Bill feels something is wrong with me and wants to know why I'm acting so distant. I tell him how much he offended me and how humiliated I felt when he said ".............". Bill realizes what he has done and genuinely apologizes to me for his actions. Our relationship, rather quickly, is restored. That's good news. The bad news? These 2 other friends don't like or trust Bill and have no way of a healthy relationship with Bill ...or Bill's wife or Bill's children. Bill and I are good now but my careless words to others have built up a wall that grieves the very heart of God.
What's my take away from all this? I must be carefu: 1) Not to cause someone else to take up my offense 2) Realize that I can take up an issue against someone I don't have the right to
Let me leave you with a scripture that helps me to keep negative issues at bay in my life:
Phil 4:8
Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy — meditate on these things.
NKJV
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